valentines

Eiko says,...

Happy Valentine's Day to you all.

The last week has been one tear-jerking event after another, and honestly, I'm all out of tears to cry. (possibly the biggest lie I've ever told on this blog) I really think I had enough of drama to last me at least another week, and I would really appreciate it if I could get away with not shedding a tear these next 7 days or so. (tears from cutting onions and yawning don't count!)

Break Ups are never fun and/or pretty things, and mine was quite dramatic. I haven't felt that kind of void in a while. It's been ages since I cried like that too...I do surprise myself sometimes with the most ridiculous outbursts when it comes to things related to matters of the heart. Well, that sickening void that seems to suck the rest of the life left in you away needs to be taken care of quick, and I have been going to great lengths to fill that particular void that I was feeling in my heart to make sure that doesn't happen.

The last 4 days have been a series of weeping, drowning myself in alcohol, cigarettes, and indulging myself in disgustingly romantic novels and films, sappy music, chocolate, filth, and self-loathing. Indulging in those things seemed to be the only few things I was capable of doing! I was mentally paralyzed.

I missed my last train AGAIN the other night while out drinking down-town with co-workers. I almost slipped on the icy-sidewalk walking back from an all-you-can-drink-night-out. One night I even drank alone...something I JUST DON'T DO! The mornings were spent recovering from hang-overs and rolling and moaning in bed from exhaustion and pain.

But it's time to get up, get over it, and start living. It's Valentine's Day, and I started it off right. I woke up and did a work-out--flushing out my lungs from all the smoke, and getting my heart pumping and my blood flowing. I felt better teaching at work, and talking with friends. Something happened later on in the evening that threw me back on my back and I felt paralyzed all over again. But what can you do? Right now, staying on the floor isn't much of an option. Tomorrow's another day.

Life can be a real bitch sometimes.

Sigh.

Oh, right. Happy Valentine's Day, just in case I didn't say it here.

Bah!

P.S.
'No emotional, sappy shit on this blog' was a rule, and I just broke it! ...
Watch 'Tangled'. It was a great film! *wink*