last last friday night...

While waiting at a smoking area for my colleague for some after-work-otsukare-drinks at the HUB, a cigarette in one hand and my mobile in the other, I noticed a man scooting his way closer to me through the other smokers from the opposite side of the smoking area.

"Oneeesan..."

Now? Seriously? I thought as I pulled my mobile closer to my face and turned away from him. I took a long puff on my cigarette. Let's give him the silent treatment.

"Oneeesan..."

Silent treatment. A puff.

"Oneeesan,...Oneeesan,..."

By the forth 'Oneesan', I was pretty creeped out. I mean, how many times does a dude need to say 'Oneesan' till he thinks he has been heard? I turned his way and gave him my, 'do you belong somewhere else--a mental institute to be exact?' look. I think he took it the wrong way.

'ちょっと魅力的な顔だなと思ってさ。。。’

Ew!! I turned away, rolling my eyes. He was ugly AND old! And seriously? 'ちょっと魅力的’???　How 'bout ’今までも見たことの無いような’ or something better if you're trying to pick up a girl that is obviously 30 years (or more) younger than you!!! Back to my cigarette. Back to silent mode.

'オレとさ、お食事しましょう。ネ？お食事。お食事どうですか？’

I was like, 'SUPER not interested!' I'm meeting up with my (imaginary) boy friend,　and he's here any second, so you can F off now. Take a hint or talk to my cold shoulder, huh?' (in jp of course)

’彼氏？ウソだろ。いないだろ？一晩だけ。お食事だけですよ。このわたしじゃダメ？これじゃダメですか？’

I was like, 'Lemme think,...yeah, nope. Go away. Now.'

'笑い。良いじゃないですか！ダメですか？彼氏は一晩おいてオレとさ。。。ダメですか？’

At this point I started walking towards the other smokers, having had far more than enough of all his 'damedesukas' and his nudges and super creepy yellow-teeth-smile.

'ハハ！ダメですか？お食事まだでしょ？まだ早いからね。いいところ知ってるんですよ、この近くにっかなりの居酒屋があってさ。彼氏とのデートは他の日にしてさ、オレと。。。’

Wow! All of this talk directed at my back!! He really did belong in a mental hospital, didn't he? Where's my colleague? Why me? Can't he pick on that girl over there? I need a beeeer!!

While these thoughts and thoughts like these raced through my mind, I could hear him continue on his pathetic pick-up lines in the distance. My thoughts were loud, but not loud enough to drown out his sleazy words. I had had enough.

'Shut up, yeah? You're ruining my Friday night and I haven't even had my first beer!!'

'ハハ！ハハ！本当にダメですか？このオレじゃダメ？

At this point I do recall growling out of sheer annoyance at this dude that couldn't take a hint of any kind! That, I mean the growling, seemed to do the trick, thank god!

And with a reluctant , 'ジャ。。。また今度会いましょう！’, he started walking off towards the station.

What the hell is 'let's meet again' suppose to mean?! I was starting to get quite annoyed at my colleague who was running 5 minutes late to meet up with me for drinks. What was taking him so long? Ugh! I settled into a vacant corner in the smoking are, pulled out my 5th cig, and began lighting it when whadyaknow! Another equally old, ugly man started shimming his way towards me! It was NOT my night.

'Oneeesan...chottosa....' he began, and I wasn't going to let him finish his sentence.

'Oh, Fuck NO!! Super big FUCK NO, all capitalized! '

'オレとさ、お食事。。。’

I think I was just about to explode. I was very, VERY thirsty, my colleague was late, I had just finished my longest teaching day of the week, and I was in dire need to be left alone by perverts! I think he saw all that being translated into lava building up behind my irises, about to explode in his face and he only continued his pathetic pick-up lines for a few more seconds!

'ハハじゃ、また今度。。。’and with that he started walking away. What's with these dudes and their, 'see you next times'??? Idiots.

When my colleague finally showed up, I let him have it! Was annoyed, thirsty, tired and pissed. I drank quite a bit that night, tell ya that much.