Preacher's Kid Syndrome, Rumspringa, TFI Teens

Eiko says...

If you're a parent in any religious group, then you've seen it unfold before your eyes in your teen, or have witnessed other parents struggle with their teen's excessive behavior. Everything that you tried so hard to impart to your child backfires at you when they hit their preteen years, and it almost seems like you've been raising a monster all this time! Why? You were faithful to protect them from TV and excessive movie viewing. You monitored their Internet usage, their computer games, the music they listen to and their friends. Perhaps you even home schooled them as another precaution to protect them from the evil that's just so rampant in this world today. So why on earth is your child (excuse me, 'preteen') acting like everything you've tried to shield him/her from?

I was surprised to find out that there is a term for this excessive preteen behavior other than adolescence. May I present to you,

the Preacher's Kid Syndrome!!!

Preacher's Kid Syndrome is separated in two stereotypes:

1. Preacher's kids act as if they are "holier-than-thou". They preach their beliefs to anyone they encounter. They do not like to be wrong about anything they preach, even in the opinions of others. They may be also proponent, and in some cases, spoiled brats.

2. Preacher's kids start off as good, faithful children, but anywhere from their preteen years to their adult life, they rebel. They do anything they can to avoid the church and their practices. They may deny their parents outright or they may be rebellious behind their parents backs.

I honestly don't know which is worse: stereotype 1 or stereotype 2. I've seen both stereotypes in myself and in my peers and friends, where their parents attempt to raise them in their beliefs and religion, and the teens become extremely rebellious or extremely self-righteous and 'holier than thou'.

Being raised in the TFI, I can relate to both stereotypes. In my preteen years, I felt like I knew better than my peers in secular society because I knew the 'truth', and the 'Word of God' and I can imagine what a pain in the a-hole I must have been then. Later on in my teen years, I felt that rebelling against everything I was told to do and follow was a MUST! All the logic and common sense aside, I had to say no, I had to do the opposite, I had to rebel!

One fine day while I was browsing YouTube during my school hours, I stumbled across the film, 'The Devil's Playground' which is a documentary featuring Rumspringa. Rumspringa (meaning running around) generally refers to a period where Amish youth are permitted to, and in some cases even encouraged to explore the non-Amish world. Like many teenagers do, Amish adolescents engage in rebellious behavior resisting or defying parental norms. And like many customs, the enforcements are relaxed, and misbehavior tolerated or overlooked to a degree in an Amish community. So during Rumspringa, a certain amount of misbehavior is unsurprising and is not so severely condemned (for instance by shunning, kinda like excommunication. )

So, let's say you're a teenager raised in an Amish Community and you want to let your hair down (literally), and experience what it's like to not be Amish before you join completely. You'll be able to experience a non-Amish lifestyle during Rumspringa where doing the things listed below are tolerated and/or overlooked, because everybody understands that you are Rumspringa-ing!!

*Wearing non-traditional clothing and hairstyles

*Driving vehicles that are not horse-drawn.

*Not attending Home Prayer

*Drinking and/or using recreational drugs

*Engaging in pre-marital sex

etc.

It's interesting to note that the vast majority choose Baptism and join the Church after Rumspringa.

I mean, I'm sure the Amish parents do an excellent job in training their children in the admonition of the Lord, and that they ground them well in the Word from an early age. But when they hit their youth, and they Rumspringa, they will eventually see where it ain't, because statistics show that most of them join the church. I personally think that if the TFI had a form of Rumspringa, or if the teachers and parents embrace the idea of Rumspringa, a lot more of the youth of the TFI would still be here with us. I'm not so sure, but that's just my view on the whole shabang.

And I am by no means demeaning the importance for rules and standards. An organization without rules is like a body with no skeletal structure. You'll be an octopus. I don't like octopus at all, eating and otherwise. I don't even like takoyaki. I just think that there's definitely a balance, and being overly restricting might have the opposite effect.